part legend, part devil, ALL MAN

things to do on an elevator

1) CRACK open your briefcase or handbag, peer Inside and ask “Got enough air in there?”
2) STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.
3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you’re embarrassed when they open themselves.
4) GREET everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.
5) MEOW occasionally.
6) STARE At another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: “You’re one of THEM” - and back away slowly

7) SAY -DING at each floor.
8) SAY “I wonder what all these do?” And push all the red buttons.
9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10) STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: “I have new socks on.”
11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look around and ask: “Is that your beeper?”
12) TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13) DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: “This is my personal space.”
14) WHEN there’s only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn’t you.
15) PUSH the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
16) ASK if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.
17) HOLD the doors open and say you’re waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say “Hi Greg, How’s your day been?”
18) DROP a pen and wail until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: “That’s mine!”
19) BRING a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
20) PRETEND you’re a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the Passengers.
21) SWAT at flies that don’t exist.
22) CALL out “Group hug” then enforce it.

-stolen from ebaums

what the hell is on joeys head

the fat sweaty white man part


and now the fun techno part

R.I.P. Chapelle Show

what did the 5 fingers say to the face

slap
its my beer

i gotta find his head with ma foot.. thats the hard part

have you ever heard a song that tells who you are so well

your racist if you think swords dont kill asains too

changed my life

if u want to watch in order watch the 2nd video first

awesome one/2nd one


1st real one

well
i leaving the country tomrow +1
hooray italy
one week in florence
one week in corsico?
drinking vino
wearing super chest showing shirts
sitting in a hammock
in a vila
waking up next to strangers
and waking up next to justinn
cant waitt!

my new rolemodel

well i found a new role model
genghis khan
not only did he have a huge empire
he populated 8% of the people in his former empire
there like all his direct descendant
.5% of the world populating
16 million people
he got it on
http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2003/02/0214_030214_genghis.html

you know my leather so soft but dont think i aint hard

well friday i went to kats but mainly colletes
mad alot fun
kat is the worst stripper ever
she cant even work the pole without hurting herself
pshh
wata noob
and ali never showed up on a magic carpet to grant me three wishes
and collete really does make good popcorn
then last night i went to d'annas (paul bunyan) sweet 16
saw some peopel havent seen in a whilee
and lior and justin and mortimer where fighting over drinking
it was so funny
im gunna not drink till the summer
and i havent drank since 420
but i might today
but come on
its a house party
i gotta be cool in front of the big bad college kid
me and sky had so muhch fun last nightt
peanut butter
pretzel and oatmeal cookie sandwhich
i just relized we ate a pound of peanut butter
and no milk
we champ mad hard

would you rather have sex with anyone in the world anytime for a month., or get free food for the rest of your life
-stolen

fuck being a free agent

man
ima free agent for frisbee
i told craig to put me on the draft list but he forgot
)=
and went to visit liz last night
was mad fun
liz did good singing
can u blackout smoking
me and adam where wondering?
i know it causes memory loss
but i mean like blackout like drinking from smoking
i dont think u can

i be on that all night

ya
we lost again in lax
im used to it
and i got caught cursing again
and i might be benched
not really sure why
whatever
oh ya
got an ipod 30gb video for 40$
and it works and everyhting
so life is great
and just made alota money
so life is 2x great
and was gunna see kat tomrow
but someone breaks plans
but i partying up at new paltz sat
i dont care about lizes performance
just seeing my lover
you know who u are

i be on that all night
i be on that kryptonite
straight up on that kryptonite
and 2 days ago i had a big black women sub for english
she believed me and a spanish kid where brothers
and i was 1/2 dominican
i am from the west end of DR!
and she sings a gospel chior
so her and all the other big black girls where talking gospel
it was a wacky day

diamonds and girls

ok
last night was so funny
baked and then saw harold and kumar

u boys ready for a cockmeat sandwhich

the movie was so so funny
it was with tim brohut
lizzo
bsul
c-mal
k-wal
kitner
so it was a really funny group of people

hat trick sonn

yaa sonnn
i gotta hat trick
and shoulda had 4 goals
but missed a shot so close
it happens
and i was getting shut off the whole game
yess im the best
and it was a funny asain kid shutting me off
stop sleeping azn kid!
im not im just azn!
silly asians

and we won
so it was mad nice
i got a 48 on an Italian test
Italian is so stupidd
i wish i could drop it

noe stop stop stop stop now go go go go

get out the car get out the car let it roll let it roll let it roll

ya
today i got caught ghost ridin da whip )=
daddy saw me lior mike justin doing it
it was sorta funny
but scary
i was ontop of liors volvo while it was riding like on our street
and we where all ghost riding it
and i was just dancing on top of the hood
while lollipop was blasting
it was so so much fun
i wana do it again
but not around my daddy
and in a super fast car
ima ask amay if he wants to ghost ride it

at dinner i was talking about how my braces hurt
and daddy said
"well if lior jammed on the breaks u woulda fell off the car and slammed all your teeth out
then you wouldnt have to worry about your braces hurting"
hehe
oh daddy
no one gets hurt ghost ridin da whip

all great things come to an end

break is over
it happens
me and lenny mad tight about it
had a sweet 16 today
coulda dances alot
but it was light in the dance floor
so i couldnt bust out any super dirty moves
but it was still funn
it was a chill break
like some nights where fuck ya chug beer and stuff
then some where
giggle exhale
and some where
smores!
and some where family
but all where funn
cant wait till the fucking summmer
and i like gouda cheese now
mad good

sunburn sucks real bad
hurts to do anything
i got it really good
cause
"bro no way ur gunna get sunburn where just playing frisbee"
"the suns barely out"
nah i dont need sun tan lotion
this years gunna be differnt and im not gunna get a sunburn everytime i go anywhere without a shirt on
i was wrong
like every year
hopefully ill learn
or skin cancer will teach me
which ever comes first

went to a bonfire last night
mad alot fun
was ok on the pong table
lost
even though we won
they where just stupid drunks
the girl shot outta turn
and made it in
then i shot and made it
but it didnt matter cause she shot out of turn
and they missed redemption
was so stupid
so we just went to ot
they won
)=
12-1 so far spring break
not to bad

and my momma birthday today!
i made her lunch and tea and stuff
and got up early to say happy birthday to her
and made her a cd cause she wanted one
its sucha good cd

and i want a black 5950
and a white one
i feel like i can wear it and make it classy at a sweet 16
like kayne west/lil wayne classy
not old english man fancy

you niggas soft
you should be rapping in leotards

ok
still undefeated at beerpong over break
sucha good break
tryed some new stuff
was pretty aweosmee
7-0
good shit
and won a game for money
dont fuck with matt craig and burg
MD

bro i fucking love getting high

happpy 4/20

ok so spring break is going so fucking good
friday night i went to this pretty much lax party
it was at this kid walshs house and it was so awesome
we had to go for a beer run
and his brother didnt come home
so me and bsul and mike sadorki stole a car and it was the best car ride ever
so scary and fun
it was aweosme cause bsul drove
didnt have a license
and has only been driving 2x with his dad
and we where carrying 90 beers in the car
and 6 smirnoff for lior
)=
my friends need to drink beer
thats why i love justin
he started drinking beer
and lior only drinks smirnoff )=
so that party was awesome
brofest
but ina good way
and i went 5-0 in beer pong
me and matt richies official beer pong record
5-0
guidos for life
then last nihgt went to the backdoor
i didnt go in
and hung out with some people
it was pretty funn
and party today
mybe ill smoke
idk
and ya
spring break has been mad fun